Lin Jessie的部落格

it's almost 4 in the morning. time just flies even when you're doing nothing. that's how it works. was trying to get organized, which is an extreme difficult task. a bit upset. doing nothing for the past few hours and still there's so many things i need to do. a long long list. too long a list and i get distracted so easily. sigh.

something wrong? nothing right? everything's not in their places where they should be. life is a mess. arrrrrgh. screaming won't help but it's good at least to get something out. it's so hard to find someone who understands, who shares the same values but it's even harder to find someone who is willing to listen. everyone wants to speak their mind. when you start to say one thing, they have some many good opinions about this, and eventually, you don't get to say what you want to say, you listen to what you have to listen. i guess being a good listener really makes one a good friend.

life is getting tougher and too complicated these days. talking nonsense again. if only i had someone to talk to in real life, i wouldn't complain here all the time. well, it's kind of cool that this poor guy doesn't exist. hopeless. i was checking out time management, life goals, how to manage priority, etc. guess what? almost nothing is really new to me. perhaps in someway what plato or socrates said was true. we knew all the things in the world when we were born, but we just forgot them all. after we came to this life, we started to remember everything. there's nothing new under the sun. cause it has seen all? not sure. well, for me, so far, i guess most things in life, most important things in life, ways of living, i've learned enough to survive or to get by. the problems is i often forgot those important thing. and one thing which is even worse is the problem probably all human beings have, i just don't do it. we know we should do this this and that but we just don't do it. i don't have strong wills. i don't persist to those things, those rules i would like to follow. we all know eating vegetables and fruits are good for us but how many of us can be vegetarians? smoking and drinking are bad. more and more people i know quit smoking but drinking isn't something they want to give up. why not? we all need some pleasure in life to live our lives. key word: pleasure. besides, if a problem doesn't bother us enough we won't want to spend time and energy to deal with it. and we all rely on others to solve our problems. too often we start to ask people questions which we can easily solve on our own with a bit more extra energy and effort. well, it's easier to ask to bother other people than waste our time to search. one thing i really cannot take is some people just take in all those answers people give them without any doubts. come on. use your brain. somehow i feel like shouting at these people. sigh. stop complaining. time to do something or just simply get some sleep.

can't sleep. it's almost 5 am. sigh again. thought of what my student told me in class when asked why he took my class even though hes a graduate student who majors in english. he told me he needed to practice his speaking, which is his weakness. besides, "i like your class. i think you're cute." emh. i didn't know what to say, didn't even say thank you. last time, a student said i liked you a lot to me after class. a cute girl. well, it's nice to be liked. life doesn't always go the way we want. we often want something we can't have. we often can't have something we want. life is not fair in many ways but also fair in some ways. if you work hard, eventually it pays off. what makes a person unhappy? just one thing: things don't go the way he/she wants it to be. that's not getting what he/she wants. that's why the less you want, the happier you are.